It started out as an ordinary week until...

It started out as a typical week in China until everything changed.  My realization that something important was happening did not come about until several days later.  Only now am I able to fully appreciate the entire influence of my last week’s work.  My changes were palpable in my emotions and reactions to things around me.  My excitement came from my recommitment to discovery learning, larger social problems, universal ideals, humanity, etc.

Manifestly my changes started out slowly at first.  I ostensibly started taking late night walks after class to practice my Chinese; however, I had greater questions in mind.  I had been thinking an awful lot lately about the plight of humanity.  After careful reflection the trigger points for my writing came from the gravity of social problems at hand, a discussion with a Chinese student, and listening to a program on NPR on exporting American technologies abroad.  The first point seems to be from a general brooding of mine for the discovery of “truth”.  Now for a little digression on why I have been so interested in discovery truth.  

 I have been reading Gandhi’s autobiography and the “Brothers Kazaramov” which both deal with similar subject matter.  It is interesting to see how the two different works both reflect a basic need to understand humanity and our place within the universe.  Overall, I was struck by a line I will paraphrase from Dostoevsky: “The more I love humanity the more I despise people”.

Needless to say this thought struck me as being an odd one at first.  However, after thinking about it and reading further I was definitely intrigued by it.  Dostoevsky also uses a lot of foils in his stories for good and evil and references biblical ideals often.  This novel is terribly interesting to me in my search for greater purpose, understanding, etc. 

Gandhi’s work deals a lot with his greater search for understanding across cultural, social, ethical, and religious grounds.  Gandhi’s life is a remarkable story of staying true to himself.  His pursuit of justice, truth, and the greater good is truly astounding.

These two works have really been the sources for my thinking lately here in China.  I am truly fortunate to have stumbled on both of them and feel that I am growing as an individual by trying to take their lessons to heart.

The essence of my frustration seems to be in the underlying ideals of these works.  Can I really have the strength of personal discipline of a M. G?  Or I am able to master the religious discipline of the pious Father Zossima from the Dostoevsky?  In either case, I have been questioning myself and my actions lately.  This negativity lead me to my break through which has been a source of hope for me!

My epiphany came to me while on one of these two hour walks last week.  I often would stop to jot down my thoughts on different ideas in one of my journals.  One such idea was my universal anger at cultural relativism.  I was upset at some of the negativity that is drawn from sources of difference within societies.  “Why do they do …. so and so.”  In any case, I felt that it was a weak way of passing judgment on someone else who we often know so little about, but carry the same human faults that we posses.   

I was also upset at the basis for all judgment questions.  There seems to be an underlying need to feel superior at the expense of another human being.  This innate disposition for some people is so common place that the perpetrator becomes completely unable to see the world from someone else’s perspective.  In fact, they are so blinded by their own self-righteousness that they forget the essence of humanity, the blessings of this earth, etc.  They live in a world cut-off from reality and are; therefore, lost to reality.  Only through greater reflection are people able to realize that in reality we are all the same.  We have the same daily needs.  We are attracted to the same ephemeral desires.  We are all social creatures.  We all count of the earth for survival.  It is my hope, dream, and purpose to try and find ways to bring about greater connection between peoples to strengthen our bounds together.

Ideas about superiority have so many flaws in them that it should be in vogue to realize our similarities at this point in human history.  Biology has found that human beings are the closet relatives among creation.  Religious works from all major religions tell us to honor all of creation.  Universal human rights are pushing us all in that same direction.  What more does a person need to hear to believe that all such differences are created out of superiority, fear, ignorance, arrogance, etc?   

Reading Dostoevsky helped me come to this epiphany.  Truly I felt a sense of purpose by his hope that universal love and happiness was close at hand!  Nearly a century and a half later we have made some impressive leaps forward in some areas.  However, in others we are no closer to reaching these lofty goals.  Inasmuch I was stricken by the need to try and continue to carry the flame of justice, love, and truth to our fellow human being and all of creation!

The next great piece of discovery came for me when talking with a Chinese student at a local pudding store.  This student confessed to me a feeling that America was the greatest hope for improving the world.  He expressed his want for universal human rights, the betterment of all, etc. 

I walked a middle road as to any show of my true feelings.  In most matters in China I still try and conceal my true feelings as a mode of self-preservation.  In reality, I know that I am very safe here; however, I would never jeopardize my freedom by trying to say more than is appropriate.  In any event, I was struck by this student’s interest in universal human rights and admired his passion.

I was also moved by an interview I heard on NPR last week regarding American business exporting technology and investment into needy foreign countries.  Obviously, the catch is that the business needs to make money as a mode of promoting future foreign investments.  Nonetheless, the ideals struck me as being a strong indicator of what future American investments can do for third world countries.  By increasing the viability of resources for the sick and starving American can truly transform its world image.

I feel that American business is a wonderful trigger point for such projects.  Natural resources are a need for everyone.  Without them people cannot survive.  If American companies are able to continue to use research and design to come up with future altruistic projects the world will be a better place.  These projects can revolutionize the way that people get and receive resources.  These resources will be not only be serving the people but helping fund the world’s economy.  It seems like a win-win solution to me.  In this way, I support any political policy which pushes for increased funding for research into better designs.  These jobs could be the staple of a new work force that could reinvigorate America’s stalling economy.  The next piece, foreign investments, could help build a new feature of the American economy, promote universal ideals, etc.  These two different sectors could work together to revolutionize future business.  It could help change the view that America is only looking for an easy buck abroad and improve the image of tainted foreign investment companies like Halliburton.

I believe that there is still a long way to go for America to reach such a lofty set of ideals.  Fighting the forces of bigotry, isolationism, arrogance, etc all stand in the way of truth.  Almost two- hundred years ago Dostoevsky dreamed of Russia making such a great leap forward.  The following Russian revolution did not result in the spreading of universal ideals.  However, I feel that there is much to rejoice for in these pursuits and will continue thinking about them at length.

Happy Easter and blessings to all,

Erik

Another unbelievable weekend in Rongchang County!

When faced with the enormity of events it is often hard to elucidate the actual affect that they have on a person.  The emotion is still fresh for me, and I find it hard to really elaborate at great length the reality of all the wonderful things I was fortunate to be a part of.  In reality, the only time I am really able to try and get a good hold on my feelings is when I am running.  In this way, running has become the best past time for me.  The weekend started off auspiciously enough with the commencement ceremony for our students’ sports celebration.

The importance of the sports celebration was brought to life by the eloquence, pomp, and pageantry of the opening day ceremony.  Cory and I were seated with the universities department heads; an honor which I felt I was not worthy of being bestowed upon me.  The ceremony began at 8:00 am and lasted until 9:30 am. 

For the past month and a half my students diligently practiced their roles, positions, and prescribed actions during the ceremony.  The hard work definitely paid off during the opening day ceremony.  The students were in sync in their movements as they paraded around the track.  For the next hour and a half many different forms of Chinese celebratory expression were acted for the delight of the onlookers, faculty, and staff. 

It is important here for me to make a quick digression.  In the case with many ceremonies which outstrip their intrinsic value many students were clearly not motivated to be a part of the celebration.  Nonetheless, a major Chinese custom is to always save face by putting on a “good” face no matter what.  In this way, my students and many Chinese people are able to ride the good and bad times in spite of their emotions.  I was also struck by the lack of smiling during the performance.  Another clearly cultural difference in emotions, many Chinese are reluctant to show emotion during celebrations.  It is an interesting cultural difference which I plan to think more about at length before I make any comment on it.

The next day, Cory and I set off with Mr. Tian and Mr. Tang to visit the 800 plus year old Buddhist temple carvings of Da Zu.  Cory and I were very pleased to be personally driven by Mr. Tang.  Travelling by bus is always an adventure and we enjoyed being able to have our minds at ease during the duration of the trip with our travel plans in the care of Mr. Tian and Mr. Tang.

The Da Zu wall carvings are nestled in the protected enclosure of the baodingshan Mt.  The detail, texture, scope, design, and synthesis of ideas all came together beautifully in the Da Zu carvings.  I was lost for words to describe the beauty of this internationally renowned site.  Around 1125 A.D. a Buddhist monk from India brought with him the design and motivation for the carvings.  In 70 years his vision was able to transform the peaceful mountain side of Da Zu into a magnificent wall carving depicting Buddhist law, Chinese tradition, Confucian ethics, Taoist essence, etc.  The result was a design not lacking in magnitude the beauty of any other religious sanctuary I have seen before.

   In the evening, Cory and I were joined by some of our Chinese friends for a fun K.T.V. night of signing.  I was not sure what to think about this beforehand due to my lack of vocal talents.  However, I was encouraged to learn that we would only be singing in our small group of friends.  In this intimate setting I found that I really enjoyed the experience and had an absolute blast! 

The next morning I awoke ready to go on a bike ride with a friend from town.  I was discouraged to see that the previous night the rain had dampened the road and it looked as if we were going to have to call a rain check.  However, no more than thirty minutes later I was invited to a Lou Jiao La (fun at the farmer’s) day with my friends co-workers.  I had no plans that afternoon and was really curious to see what kind of activities we would partake in.

I was extremely interested in the entire concept of the afternoon festivities.  The complex was built on the vast expanse of a mountain in which many tea plants were cultivated.  The complex itself was modern and was build with the sole intent of allowing for hosting a Chinese group.  There were badminton courts, ping-pong tables, tables for playing cards (ma Jung), and a dining hall for meals.

I enjoyed an afternoon of meeting Maggie’s colleagues, playing badminton, hiking, and eat delicious food!  Of course, I tried out my meager Chinese language skills to try and at least humor my guests into realize how honored I was to be a part of such an afternoon.  In a typical Chinese fashion I was not allowed to pay for anything and encouraged to come back again next time such an afternoon excursion was planned.  Words do not nearly express how fortunate I am to be in a place where hospitality exceeds gratitude.  Even if I was to be ungracious I am certain that the Chinese would continue to invite a foreigner to such events.  In this way, I am always shocked when I hear about a person being ungracious, disrespectful, or flat out rude to their Chinese guests.  I abjure such behavior and would not tolerate it in my presence.

On Sunday I was invited to another incredible day of celebration for Mr. Tian’s wife’s birthday.  I also unfortunately tasted for the first time the strength of unbridled Chinese liquor.  The affects of a little Bi jiao on an untrained system can wreck havoc on a person.  Nonetheless, I enjoyed delicious food, toasting, and much merry-making from all involved in the festivities.  A nice capping off another glorious weekend spent in China!

Best Regards All,

Erik

   

              

Birthday Wishes

I have spent several days vacillating on the theme which I want to mesh into this birthday blog.  I could speak about the hospitality.  But that would seem too overdone for this blog.  Or maybe I should speak about the kindness of my students’ who brought me some homemade gifts.  I could talk about friendship too.  Not just my incredibly generous Chinese friends the foreign teachers from Beibei, who came to Rongchang to help celebrate with me.  In any event I wanted to mesh in the theme of college because I have been thinking often about how to compare the different experiences of my students here in China to that of American undergraduate students.

               In any event I must start with my birthday weekend.  I confess that I was worried to mention to too many people that it was my birthday coming up.  Two major reasons occupied my train of thought here.  One reason was selfish in its intent and the other was out of genuine respect for my Chinese students.

               Let me start with the selfish reason first.  I was a little afraid about the Chinese tradition of drinking the extremely hard liquor: Bi Jiao.  I had never drunk it before and was not looking forward to drinking liquor with the potency equivalent of ever clear any time soon.

               The other reason was that I feared too much show of gifts from my Chinese students.  True to form a couple of my students found out about my birthday and brought me wonderful gifts anyways.  I knew that any resistance to these gifts would have been futile.  Therefore, I graciously thanked my friends and enjoyed the lovely gifts.

               My birthday started early.  Due to our teaching schedule it is much more advantageous to celebrate on Saturday nights because our only day off from teaching is Sunday.  Thus, the foreign teachers arrived on Saturday afternoon from Beibei.  We enjoyed a wonderful afternoon’s walk around Rongchang.  The weather was absolutely marvelous.  Low sixties, sunny, and clear skies enamored all of us foreigners who were getting pretty sick of the melancholy overcast clouds of the winter! 

               Later, we stopped at a delicious dumpling restaurant.  We were assisted in our ordering by our resident expert: Keegan O’hara.  Keegan has been living in China for quite some time now.  After studying abroad in China, Keegan decided to come back and teach at Southwest University for two years.  Following the past two years Keegan has been taking upper level Chinese language classes at Beibei and excelling in all areas.  He is exceptionally strong speaking the local dialect: Chongqing Wa. 

               After the delicious meal we went back to the apartment for some merry-making.  Altogether the foreign teachers from Beibei included:  Keegan O’hara, Brianne boardman, Kelli Nicole, and Hibes Galeano.  Cory and I rounded out the group.  We enjoyed a copious amount of liquids and the drinking game, “Cheer’s Governor”.

               Afterwards we went out to a delicious barbecue restaurant which also sold beer.  The group was joined by are amiable supervior: Mr. Tian.  The group sang happy birthday in Chinese and enjoyed more merry-making.

               The next afternoon the entire group was treated to a delicious state dinner at the best hotel in Rongchang.  The meal was absolutely scrumptious!  My actual birthday had started out with an auspicious meal which was attended by the director of the school.

               The group accompanied the foreign teachers on their way out of town.  The bus stop was crowded as usual, but with Mr. Tian with us we were able to walk through to say our goodbyes to the other teachers.  I feel so blessed to have such great friends who would come to visit me on this special day.  I know that the allure of the big city is omnipresent and appreciate their sincerity of coming to celebrate with Cory and myself.

               After a nice afternoon run I met up with Cory for what was going to be an absolutely to die for meal.  The location was set as our favorite dumpling restaurant.  Cory and I were accompanied by Mr. Tian and his wife.  Together we ate a delicious meal, toasted each other, shared some laughs, and took pictures to end the evening!  To note, I had only taken one drink of Bi Jiao at this time and was very happy to not have taken anymore!  My wishes were granted by not being asked to drink anymore at this meal.

               After a nice walk together we said our goodbyes at Mr. Tian’s apartment adjacent to the college campus.  At this point Cory and I were extremely tired.  Both of us were looking for a quite night following our previous night’s libations.  Therefore we decided on watching the movie:  “Blades of Glory.”   

               Overall, I had one of the best birthdays of my life.  I am truly blessed and appreciate all of the love and thoughts from friends and family back in the states.  Do not worry, for I am being treated like an honored guest by my Chinese friends.  I always try and return the favor when I can.  In this way, I had the great honor of finally being able to pay for a meal! 

               My great birthday paradigm shift had occurred by me actually paying for my birthday meal!  Normally, Americans would take an affront at this.  However, I was as pleased as I could have been if I was given the most precious gifts of antiquity because it was an honor for me to pay for my meal.  In this way, I was finally able to attempt a small way of thanking Mr. Tian for all of his wonderful hospitality he has shown me!

               I have been doing a little thinking regarding the mindset of my Chinese students here in China.  During an exercise geared at sharing my Chinese student’s thoughts regarding college I gleaned an important truth.  My Chinese students’ perspective about college is manifestly different than most American students.  I knew this from my researching of Chinese culture; however, the rationale dawned on me during our group discussion.  Chinese students want to do well for many reasons.  First, traditionally Chinese society has been very accepting of scholars moving up the social hierarchy.  Another reason lies in the way that my students regard their future careers.  Most of my students want to go on to further study after they finish up their undergraduate.  Thus, they regard college as a stepping stone and know that they need to keep good marks to be accepted into the best graduate level programs.  In this way, they maintain a feel of sincere seriousness about studying. 

               It is a much different perspective than American college students who regard college as an “experience” and are inclined to care as much or more about fulfilling their “expectations” of what their college odyssey should entail.  In this way, American college students will try and maximize their experiences in college.  I do not know if this is the right way for our society to act.  It creates an environment where the social expectations of gratuitous partying and drinking are not just okay but expected.  Seeing that I have just come from that climate and am have lived in America all my life it is easy for me to point the finger.  However, I realize that not every other culture sees things the same.  In this way I am remorseful at times at my expectations of a party compared to that of my Chinese counterparts.

Overall, neither approach is wrong but the differences are worth noting.  I know that even though I enjoyed and even par took in the America college environment makes me a hypocrite.  However, it is more important to acknowledge or own faults than to try and hide behind the veneer of age.  I have learned that it is best to try and remove all insecurities about oneself in a foreign country.  This is important during the times when you eat pig brain, see gratuitous spitting, and witness the manifest wasting of materials.  Nonetheless, I want to always remain true to the reality in which I am feeling and the emotions in which I am introducing on this blog.

I know from my students that they do not have the same options as American students do regarding college placement.  Many of my students have a varying degree of disappointment about falling to a smaller school in China.  Therefore, they are extremely motivated to prove their self-worth by achieving success and being accepted into an accredited graduate level program or masters after college.  These differing experiences in college highlight one area of misunderstanding between cultures.  Neither culture lacks the desire to have fun or do well in life.  The path at which the two cultures take is a little different which is worth noting.

This week is another short week due to the sport ceremony and celebration.  I will share my reactions from my long weekend’s activities and sports celebration on my next blog.  As for now, I am excited to note that I have completed my first two drawings since high school!  One is a picture based off of the “White city” of Minas Tirith, from Lord of the Rings.  The other is a picture of me running.  I am also happy to note that my parent’s package from the states arrived two days before my birthday!  Their birthday package and card definitely brightened my day!

Until next week,

blessings

 

   

"Pure Brightness Day"

PURE BRIGHTNESS DAY

Pure Brightness Day falls around April 5th every year.  Traditionally, this is an occasion for people to offer sacrifices to their ancestors.  In recent years, many people have also been going to the tombs of the revolutionary martyrs to pay their respects.  At this time of year the weather has begun to turn warm, and the earth is once again covered with green.  People live to go to the outskirts of cities to walk on the grass, fly kites and appreciate the beauty of spring.  That is why Pure Brightness Day is sometimes also called "Walking amid Greenery Day."

Last Thursday I went to my weekly Chinese language lesson with Mr. Tian interested in a schedule change.  I was aware that we would be having an extended break coming up that weekend and wanted to know what our revised schedule would look like.  Following our lessons which always include, pronunciation, intonation, memorization, and written language, my questions were answered.  I was excited to learn that because of the “Pure Brightness” celebration of Chinese ancestors all university officials had a three day weekend ahead. 

Of course, I did not believe that I was entitled to this holiday due to the fact that I did not even know that it existed before Mr. Tian informed me that I was going to have it!  Nonetheless, I was excited to be able to have a nice, long break.

Finishing the week on Friday, due to the holiday (I usually teach on Saturdays too) I was getting set to teach my 7:00 class as usual.  Mr. Tian called me at 4:45 to inform me that we had a visitor and I was invited to another state dinner at Rongchang’s premier hotel.  The occasion: meeting a new / old friend of Southwest University: Angela.

At our dinner we were fortunate to be able to meet this wonderfully intelligent, fluent, and interesting person.  Angela has been living in China for over 4 years now after several shorter stints in China.  Her time in China has included periods of in the Peace Corps, teaching at Southwest University, and now living in her life in Tibet.  While in China Anglea has picked up Putonghua exceptionally well.

            Thus she was able to converse at normal speed in Chinese with our Chinese department heads at Southwest University.  This was extremely interesting to see for Cory and myself.  Overall, I am excited to continue working hard to improve my Chinese.  It will also be a great task for me to overtake while living here this summer without Cory’s help!
            The auspice for the weekend was good after this wonderful meal and early start to the weekend.  On Sunday night Cory and I were taken out to a celebratory dinner with Mr. Tian and his family at a wonderful hotpot restaurant.  I admit that I was actually a little saddened by this wonderful, but alas expected gesture. 
            I had hoped to be able to take Mr. Tian and his wife out for a dinner that I actually had planned to pay for!  I am sure that Mr. Tian knew all along that Sunday his family would be having this wonderful feast; however, he agreed to the date ahead of time with me for the meal.  I must still be a little naïve to think that Mr. Tian is going to go easily to a meal that I actually am paying for!
            Nonetheless, the meal was phenomenal.  The atmosphere was also festive as many other Chinese families were at the restaurant also celebrating the festival together.  Overall, I was toasted by every family member as well as Cory and Mr. Tian on many occasions!  I was also offered many cigarettes. 

This experience is becoming not so novel for me and at times a little disconcerting since I have always abstained from cigarette smoking.  However, I try to remember to be culturally relative in my understanding of norms.  Sharing and gift giving is very important in Chinese culture.  Therefore, it is important to refrain from being overly enigmatic towards something.  Therefore, I always try to explain why I do not smoke.  If this actually helps clarify things to my Chinese peers I do not know.

            Yesterday, I was very pleased again to visit the Lou Guangshan Mountain which is home to the Buddhist temple I visited last month with bryan Tian.  Cory and some Chinese friends were very lucky to be able to visit the mountain when no other visitors were around.  It was a treat to be on the mountain when it was extremely peaceful all around us.  One of my Buddhist Chinese friends showed me the prayer ritual.  I was extremely interested and enjoyed learning how this is done.
            As for my teaching, I am really enjoying reaching engaged students.  I am thinking long and hard about my future after China.  It is becoming more likely in my mind that I might not want to teach high school students in America.  Due to the large inconsistencies in student engagement I feel that I may constantly feel as if I am trying to make my students “happy” or “enjoy” the information.  This feeling I never get here in China.  In this way, I am contemplating many interesting alternatives.  Such as working in the U.S. Foreign Service, getting a master’s in Chinese language, teaching longer in China, teaching in another foreign country, getting a masters or Ph.D. in America, going into business, etc.  As I continue to mull around future options for my life I am reminded constantly about being thankful for my experience here in China.
            One recent past time activity which I am re discovering is drawing.  I was fortunate enough to be invited to learn Chinese calligraphy last week.  At this meeting, I witnessed the beauty and essence of artwork again.  Re-invigorated I have taken to drawing in some of my free time.
            I am also extremely engaged in my autobiography on Gandhi and the Brothers Karamazov.  Ghandi has such interesting beliefs on truth.  A few notes on Gandhi.  I am continuing to marvel at Gandhi’s strict moral guidelines he lived by.  However, Gandhi has alluded that he did not believe in God which I am continuing to want to read further into to delve into his uniquely synthesized Vaishnava religious views.  Gandhi was also a pragmatist who recognized western prudent thoughts and proper applications of them. 

Gandhi believed in applying usefully pieces of western thought especially in medicine and dieting.  Without his time spent in Britain his unique vegetarian application might have never been as thoroughly developed.  He also witnessed the slow deterioration of his father to a fistula.  He even recognized and admitted that the community elders were wrong in recommending that Gandhi’s father not have surgery performed on the easily fixed problem.  Thus he had to witness his father’s bed side death.  One of the affects of this experience was Gandhi’s recognition that sometimes the elders were wrong.  Gandhi did not falter in standing up to community elders at points in his life.  Admittedly a shy man, Gandhi defied his caste elders and set out to England against their will.

            I am continuing to enjoy my life here every day!  A couple more wonderful meals were shared with my Chinese friends.  All meals were on the “house”, so to speak.  It is going to make my efforts at recompense all the more challenging!  Luckily, I am up to the challenge.  Two days ago I completed my best mile time to date.  A seven minute mile for the first eleven has been one of my goals for running!  I am very blessed.  Thank you for all of your correspondences with me.  They always make my day and I enjoy writing back to you all!

Best