Brevity may be the soul of wit but it is surely not the soul of my pen!

Part I: Family!

It seems like an eternity since I posted last.  I believe that the enormity of events which has passed in this time encapsulates many of humanities strongest emotions: love, family, friends, and fear.  With so much passing in such a short time it will be a challenge to keep the events to a minimum and in brevity.  I will do my best to proceed accordingly in a sequence of five major themes which do not follow in chronological order.  I am sorry for those who have trouble sometimes following my abstract random thinking process.

I became very excited towards the end of summer as my long awaited reunion with my parents drew near.  I realized that it was going to be an incredible reunion even though it had only been six months.  After being separated from each other for the longest times in our lives I knew that it would be an emotional experience.  Upon seeing my parents for the first time in the Beijing Marriott my heart started beating quickly as we meet for that first time together.  Seeing them safe and sound really made things easier for me and allowed myself to relax. 

Experiencing one another at the physical level was a little strange at first.  Having a relationship exclusively through a computer for six months tends to become quite impersonal.  Seeing reactions and experiencing things together as a family was quite pleasant and not trivial.  Strangely enough near the end of the two weeks I started to become a little hesitant to want to communicate with them.  Not for a lack of wanting.   The imminence of nine months away from one another would be extremely tough on both of us.  I found it emotionally very stressful saying goodbye at the end.  Strangely enough saying goodbye to loved ones never does get easy.  I actually felt that it might have been harder the second time knowing how long it would be until I saw them again.  The naivety of not knowing what a long separation would feel like made our first goodbyes seem trivial at the time for me.

In any event we had a great last day together in Shanghai.  Being that I had just been in Shanghai two months ago I knew the areas of the city we were visiting pretty well.  Having our tour guides accommodate a free day in Shanghai was the optimal location for me.  Due to their flight being delayed at the Shanghai airport I was able to say goodbye over that period of time which was easier than having to do it in a rush or in the prescience of the group.

With all of that fear of the unforeseen also came great hope and light for the future.  Being that my Chinese mandarin has improved greatly in the last few months I am able to have a lot more communication with the locals in town.  Now that I have Cory back with me from America I have my Minnesota connection back again.  Having a lot of new friends in Rongchang makes everything a wonderful experience.  Most of all I will finally start teaching again.  Gearing up for this semester is getting me excited again to teach.

Part II: Zhong Gou jia qi!

The vacation itself was amazing.  I really loved every place we went including Shanghai for the second time.  I was fortunate enough to be able to meet some interesting and wonderful people on the way from Beijing to Shanghai.  Our main group tour guide, Lynn, did an absolutely amazing job of aiding the American tourists the entire trip.  Having a friendly, energetic, and English fluent tour guide truly is an added bonus.  The hotels, food, and service included were all five stars in my book!  I have never stayed in nicer hotels and been treated like a king before.

At each location our tour group also had a local expert guide in the areas we would be traveling.  Jack, Connie, Sue, and Suzie May all did excellent jobs.  I felt that the whole experience was unbelievable from the standpoint of service.  The only low point for most of our group was our hotel in Yangshuo.  Besides this point everyone was overall pretty happy I thought.  Our last tour guide also had some anachronisms in her facts, but all in all a tour service I would recommend to my friends.

I cannot exactly say a favorite place or thing I did.  I would say that I would rank Beijing as my number one, Guilin; two, Shanghai; three, and Xi’an four.  The only reason why Shanghai is ahead of Xi’an is because we also went to Suzhou and Tongli while in Shanghai which I really enjoyed.

The majesty and power of Beijing is clearly present with the CPC’s presence and splendor.  The scale of the Gu Gong (Forbidden City) really left an impression on me after seeing South Korea’s counterpart which seemed almost a miniature fit to scale.  One of my highlights of the entire tour was climbing the Chang Cheng (Great Wall) with my parents.  My Dad and I basically went up as high as we could in the time which the tour allotted for us.  Seeing the wall stretch for miles as far as the eye can see leaves one with a sense of the infinite continuity of its design.

Guilin strikes me as landscape not of this Earth.  It is completely apropos to say that the Chinese are correct in saying that Guilin is the most beautiful place on the Earth.  Reaching the top of the Yao village presented our group with an incredible view of the mountain terraced landscape.  Another highlight of the entire tour for me was the Li River boat cruise.  It truly was an hour of constant picture taking.  I almost did not want to go down for lunch as I rested alone on top of our boat starring at the magnificent view of Guilin’s Karst topography. 

I enjoyed Shanghai better than in June.  I assume that it is because I had become a much more seasoned traveler in China at that point.  It also did not hurt that our less than one year old Sheraton hotel was probably the nicest I have ever stayed in.  Having the opportunity to cruise on river Gondolas down the quiet and tranquil Tongli river town allowed for peaceful repose.  I also enjoyed Suzhou’s silk factory along with the Ming and Qing dynasty gardens we visited.

Shanghai itself was exactly how I remembered it except this time I knew more from experience.  Being able to bargain in the Yu Garden bazaar was an interesting experience.  By this time Dad and I had a couple of strategies which were working very well.  First, always walk away from the street vendor after they give you a price.  They always lower it.  Next, have a real price in mind before you go.  Know the conversion rate and use that to establish what you think is reasonable.  Third, knowing Chinese is a nice tool to have.  I learned not to come out and start with Chinese because they will take advantage of your language ignorance.  Using Chinese is a situational weapon because if you hear them offer a local Chinese a lower price you can call them out on it.  I did this a couple of times and they quickly lowered their first prices.

The only reason that I placed Xi’an lowest was because I was not as impressed with the Terra Cotta soldier exhibit as I thought I was going to be.  The scale, size, and design are completely amazing; however, the exhibit does not allow for one to really view them on the personal level.  I like climbing the Great Wall and hiking up the Yao villages better.  I enjoy activity and scenery much more I guess.  Overall, I really did enjoy the Bell and Drum towers along with the Muslim mosque we went to though.  The synthesis of Islam and Chinese artwork really was quite interesting to see.

Overall I had a great time but there remain some frustrating question marks for me as well.  First, I had trouble going from living in China to having the “foreign” treatment in China.  This encapsulates in my mind several things.  First, the experience of a “foreigner” in China is much different than living in China every day.  I realize that being able to do this is impossible with only a two week tour.  Nonetheless, it is sometimes frustrating to think that many foreigners will come to China and think that they understand China now after such a short period of time. 

In my opinion that is one of the reasons why people around the world do not like some Americans.  Some Americans will come home and say to their friends, “I can’t believe what these so and so people do”, “they are so ____ fill in the blank”.  The truth is that no foreigner can ever truly understand China or any other place for that matter in two weeks.  To actually be able to understand China you must yourself be Chinese.  Even after being here six months I know that I will never understand what it feels like to be Chinese.  I would never attempt to tell someone that I “know China”, or “understand this or that about China”.  It would similar if a Chinese person came to America and said to their friends: “Ni ji dao Mei Guo da xuexeng wanr de cai xingqisi.  Zhen qi guai?”  and made some kind of a comment to the fact.

The one nice thing also about experience is that many in our group will probably go back and talk about all of the great things that we did on the tour.  They will promote better understanding in their own lives by knowing that China is a very complex place with lots of aspects to it just like America is.  Overall many will even recommend a trip to China to their friends.  Greater experience comes from greater understanding.  With understanding come equitable solutions for the future and a brighter tomorrow for all of us.

Secondly, I had a little trouble dealing with what I thought was a little excessive pejorative and degrading statement regarding translation troubles from our guides.  Yes, they have trouble saying the letter “L”, but that does not give a person the right to make fun of it.  If I could tell you how many times I have screwed up communicating in China I would need to write an entire book.  Quite honestly I have never had one of my Chinese friends make a joke of me to my face regarding my poor translation.  I spent two weeks with thirteen Americans and heard several comments of that nature.

The positive with this experience is that people will also come back with greater appreciation for how difficult it is to speak the Chinese language.  It clearly is a double flip of the coin here as well with the “foreign” treatment.  Some of the people on the trip were even trying to learn more about the culture as well.  Together each thing offsets the other to complete a whole experience which develops better bounds between people.

The last sad observation which I made is regarded to cultural egocentrism.  If I could have received a quarter for the number of times I heard people in our group make comments regarding how China was wrong on something I could have a good amount of yuan to spend (6.4 yuan to one U.S. dollar)!  I know that China has quite a few issues to deal with but guess what so does America.  Making comments to the group about those kinds of comments are unbecoming to a culture that values respect and keeping your ideas to yourself.  Those are the kind of ideas that are probably best left unsaid.

I talked with the tour guides regarding what kind of things they had learned from Americans in the course of their careers.  One of the things echoed by several of the tour guides was that Americans are all very different and have quite interesting experiences, backgrounds, and opinions.  It really echoes my experience in China as well.  The lives of the farmers and people from Beijing and Shanghai are quite different.  The experiences and perspectives of each group truly reflect their personal situations in life.

Part III: Cory’s back, hui jia Rongchang!

Getting back to Chongqing and greeting Cory for the first time in two months was great.  Being able to have a friend back who really relates with me is extremely beneficial being half way around the world.  As we got back to Rongchang that night we talked about all of our experiences.  Clearly both of us had great summer breaks.  Looking forward we started to discuss our future plans which have opened us both up to some interesting options.  Being that we are both in China until next year we had previously thought that we would want to teach the following year in South Korea.  As time has passed neither of us are exactly certain as to what road we will choose next.  We discussed teaching in China and possibly remaining in Rongchang as well.  Overall, we both want to play it by ear and see how things are progressing as the year moves forward.  Seeing that I have improved my Chinese is also driving me towards possibly staying longer in China.  I feel that it would be such a great tool to have in life and am having fun learning and using it as well.

Part IV: Danger came when it was least expected; Xiao xin!

Yesterday started off as any normal day for me.  It would be a normal day in the sense that I was going to go on a run.  As I got near the end of my nine mile run something strange happened.  I became quite slow and almost considered stopping.  Now, I have run this route very often and even during times of greater heat so I thought nothing of it.  Finally, I had to stop near the end which struck me as very weird.  When I got back I immediately started hydrating.  Knowing that I was a little less hydrated than normal did not enter into my mind.  Usually I spend all night hydrating when I run in the morning but did not this time.  Maybe I chose not to hydrate while Cory was sleeping in the room too in order to not wake him.  Maybe it was because I was used to running inside for the past two weeks in air conditioning and I forgot to remember that I really needed to pre hydrate in the Chongqing heat.  In any event, after my run I went about working on my daily plans without thinking much of it.

I took not that I was unable to urinate after several drinks of water and gatorade.  Still I went about cleaning, organizing, and un-packing from my trip.  I was upset because my place looked like a pig sty last night.  Cory had to sleep on my futon because he was with a sufficient power supply at his apartment.  All of a sudden I started feeling really disoriented.  I soon realized I must be having a migraine.  I took two Excedrin migraine headache pills and continued hydrating.  As things were getting worse quickly I realized that I had not eaten anything but an apple that morning and quickly grabbed some small snacks to try and help my stomach.  I was not hungry but I realized that things were deteriorating quickly so I tried everything I could think of. 

I finally caved in and put on the air conditioning in my apartment.  With day time temperatures into the one-hundred’s I have still managed to keep my air conditioner off during day time hours in an effort to conserve energy.  As things got worse and worse I realized that I might have suffered some kind of heat related illness.  I was surprised that I was not feeling any sensation in my body as I took a cold shower in an effort to cool down.  Finally, I resorted to putting ice bags on my head and around my neck to do what I could to help.  I soon became delirious and unable to think at all.  My thoughts went strangely between some kind of alternative reality and my current condition. 

I literally thought that I was having an outer body experience.  As things got to the point of completely exhaustion I started to panic.  Shock took over me as I called Cory to my aid.  Thankfully he was there to answer my call.  I am very lucky to have such a great friend who could calm me down and talk me through what was going on.  I was completely lost to what was happening and his guidance was a gift to my weak constitution.

Two days later I am very thankful that I am completely feeling normal and have no further complication from this terrible ordeal.  It is always a gift in life to be able to see how fortunate we are when things are going well.  I know now that I cannot underestimate the power of the Chongqing summer.  I know now that I will always need to be on my guard when training in the heat.  Even with drinking all of the water I do a couple of weeks off of my routine completely through my system off.  Not to mention lack of regular sleep hours, stress, and a cold on my vacation.  Altogether the body is the sum of all parts.  Losing a bunch of small functions is usually less obvious than having one big issue arise at once.  In the case of my heat exhaustion the sum of all parts ended in a much larger catastrophe that could have been prevented.

Part V: Future

Being able to teach again will be something that I am extremely looking forward to.  It has been a long and eventful summer break.  I was able to have great travels, improve my Chinese, meet new friends, enjoy my independence, and re unite with my family.  All in all it was my favorite summer of my life.  With this in my past I am even more certain that this next semester is going to be much better than my first.  Nothing substitutes the lessons learned from genuine experience.  Talking with Cory about are ideas for the future reinvigorated my passion for teaching.

Cory and I are excited to welcome a new American teacher from the Peace Corps.  Allie from Pennsylvania will be adding to our cohort new ideas and background experience.  Judging from our brief encounters I believe that the group will work well together in the future.  I am hoping for the best for all of those in Minnesota as you gear up for a wonderful transition into a beautiful fall season!

Erik

 

                   

                   

A life pausing discovery, great friendships, and future travels!

My last two weeks signified a great awakening in my spirit.  I had put a lot of stock in gaining as much intellect as I could during my time in China.  I believed that reading and writing were two areas which idealized intellectual curiosity and creativity.  I also wanted to take advantage of the unique experiences of learning a different language in a foreign country.  I knew that this was my single greatest opportunity to learn about Chinese cultural as well.  High physical athletic attainment always was something that has always been paramount in my life.  Training my body and mind for the Chongqing marathon helped me fill that void.  However in all my wisdom I had seemed to miss out on the single greatest element of experience itself.   That I neglected to put a great emphasis on was the human factor and wonders of personal experience with local Chinese is something that might seem shocking to some people reading this blog.  I would remind all readers to realize how strange the motivations of others can seem from afar.  After truly discovering my motivations I realize now that is partially why I came so lassiez-faire to China in the first place.  I knew that whatever happened with my experiences it would be fine because I was going to accomplish my goals.  For those of you who question my motivations I offer a word of caution.  First, try your best to understand your own motivations for doing anyone thing.  After you have decided on what that thing is think about it for a while and then try and look through your motivations from someone else’s perspective.  It is always easier for someone else to point a finger than to try and really understand that other point of view. 

Besides this pragmatic element of thinking, I also did truly believe that all people are much more similar and relatable than many think.  Meeting so many great people and learning from them has been something that I would never have imagined was going to be what left the greatest mark on my life and time in China.  Looking back many years from now I will not remember all of the running, reading, and writing that I did.  Sure, it will all make an important impact on my future and are pursuits which I enjoy greatly in my free time.  What I will remember is the kindness of my friends, the excitement of my students, the walks, the dinners, and the greatness of freedom.  One cannot measure such a thing as freedom in the mind of a young person.  The free soul is able to discover so much about oneself, world, and meaning in life. 

Living in my world which placed such an emphasis on reaching goals and targets; I almost forgot to open myself up to the wonders of everyday experience.  I had spent a vast amount of time this summer living strangely like a hermit if I was not training for the marathon outside or playing basketball.  I was getting up late and staying up even later.  I tended to blow people off regarding doing other activities than what would meet my “tight” personal schedule based off of my goals.  Missing a day of writing, reading, or running was not an option for me that I would have considered.  Later, I started to become exceedingly depressed with the lack of meaningful social interaction I was having each day.  I avoided eating my meals outside.  I tended to be a reclusive misanthrope who enjoyed doing everything on a strange schedule just because I had found pleasure knowing that I was doing whatever I wanted to do.  I was selfish beyond all recall and shut off people in my egocentric world.  Sadly this type of behavior is not a new phenomenon in my life.  Being driven to success at such a price is a thing in which I have struggled with mightily in my life.  The last few days I have modified my schedule to be back within the realm of society and I have found that I am again having meaningful experiences.

My second night at this new preferable schedule found myself faced with one of my greatest challenges I have experienced in my life.  People who have not experienced the frustrations of failed communication in a foreign country can never appreciate how priceless clear communication can be.  I know that I certainly did not before coming to China.  As I prepared to go to dinner I took with me my normal carefree manner which has helped keep me balanced in China.  As I went to sit down for dinner twenty or thirty people fixed their gaze in my direction.  Due to the large crowd I know that I was going to be forced to sit with others.  At this very moment of partial terror something unexpected happened.

  Two older gentlemen flagged me over to their table.  As I sat down they started firing away some questions at a normal pace Chinese pace.  The next few minutes an even greater surprise hit me as I started to actually communicate with them better than I ever had before.  It was one of those unique moments when I realized that even though each party in the conversation was unable to comprehend the other perfectly miracles can happen any day.  One or two times things became un-comprehensible for me as I tried my best to understand.  Even with these challenges I had great happiness at being able to get past some questions that would have tripped me up in the past.  I can really thank my improvements on two people: Maggie, and Emma.  Both of these great friends enjoy going on walks which allow me to practice my Chinese as they work on their English.  I have a special place in my heart for Emma as she helped me rediscover how wonderful human experience is.

Maggie’s summer holiday to Tibet kept me with only Emma to have meaningful conversation with beyond the rudimentary level of English.  As most of my friends have left over summer vacation for their home towns I soon kept less social engagements.  Fortunately, a teaching opportunity fell into my lap as I was lucky to have been the only foreigner who speaks English in Rongchang at the time.  Little did I know that I was going to meet a truly special group of Chinese-English teachers who would change my experience in China.  I was offered to teach one class for elementary, middle, and high school students.  As I entered in ready to teach I was struck by the fluency of English from some of my fellow colleagues.  When I finished teaching my day of classes I decided to avoid lunch with the foreign teachers.  Better to keep to my own very important schedule of goal reaching.  I feel ashamed to say that I did this and had been doing it somewhat repeatedly this summer.  I often justified it through my pragmatic argument that no one really could understand how much my serious goals meant to me personally.  In avoiding some opportunities I relied on a coy nature of elusiveness which usually kept me at an arm’s length from making commitments.  Besides, I thought why should I continue to be the object of everyone’s affection?  By this point I was becoming annoyed with my “rock star” attention which I was getting.  I grew a great desire to have this wrongly elevated attention cast off me like Prometheus had desired while burdened with the weight of the world on his shoulders.

I used these excuses and more to mentally justify my solitude.  Personality changes resulting from this neglectful state of being altered my entire life.  I no longer wanted to say “hi” or “hello” to my fellow Chinese hosts anymore.  The ticking time bomb of depression exploded finally due to the exacerbated effects of all of these elements.  I spent several days alone in my house unable to find the motivation to leave.  I did not want to work out and decided to fill that empty time slot with a constant amount of entertainment.  As my mental depression spread to physical depression I entered a strange phase in my life which, sadly, is neither the first time I have over worked myself to fulfill personal goals.  Prolonged sadness over periods of time is truly the greatest ailment a person can endure causing both mental and physical paralysis.  As I hoped to somehow “entertain” away my sadness I received a call from a friend regarding some business we had previously discussed.  After avoiding answering his call for several hours I decided that I would put on a good face and speak with him.  Afterwards something I did not intend happened which changed my existence.  I started to feel better.  Not better from any resolution of our conversation but mentally happier just by speaking with a friend.  When I realized this I picked up my phone and dialed Emma. 

Over the next two weeks I would get to know Emma through a series of encounters.  We enjoyed walks together in which conversation would freely between different topics and ideas.  I really appreciated her sincere desire to be a great friend for me in this time of personal and mental challenges.  Once I began to get to know her better I grew a great respect for her sincere kindness.  I rarely have meet people who have as sincere of a heart as Emma.  We connected on a myriad of topics and ideas.  Our conversations added a new perspective to how I view Chinese youth.  Having a background in Chongqing definitely made an impact on her educational upbringing.  Emma clearly had an intellectual curiosity about herself which is less frequent in Rongchang.

 I enjoyed spending time with the entire group of Chinese-English teachers.  I will make a quick digression on summer vacation in China.  Frankly, students in China do not have one.  As they finish their regular year’s worth of studies almost all enroll in summer school where they go to school five days a week for six hours a day.  I believe that their level of personal stress, competition, and academic rigor is at a level where most American students cannot appreciate.

This week of summer vacation was my happiest time spent over my holiday up until this point.  I enjoyed playing games and meals with my Chinese friends.  I was struck by their ability for thorough class preparation.  Emma was very strong in her English and knew the materials quite well; therefore, she was free most nights for walks.  Her other colleagues were not as fortunate as they spent several hours each night preparing for the next day’s classes.  Even with these limitations they found a couple hours for fun at night.  I improved my Chinese greatly over this month spent with these amiable Chinese teachers.  I really appreciated all of the good memories as I look forward to all of the new great ones coming up when my parents come and visit me in China. 

My parent’s preparations for China are in full-swing at this point.  I felt great satisfaction by being able to help my parents in the way that I was by others as I embarked on my journey to China.  After answering some questions for them I realized that I was starting to become insightful on China and Chinese culture.  Afterwards, I started to think back on the time I had already spent in China and became amazed with how fast time has progressed.  In less than two weeks I will have already been in China for six months.  As I think back to my last departure from Minnesota my greatest feeling of separation has come from the people that I love. The lessons that I needed to re-learn from Emma and her colleagues about the beauty of human interactions made me re-evaluate many of my tight goals and schedules that I like to keep in life.  I was also thrown a life line by my father’s timely advice to remove great blame in life.  I had lived so long blaming myself for so many things without consciously picking up on it that the gravity of this advice did not even strike me as landmark.  However, as I started to reflect and used this advice to really change my outlook I soon realized the gravity of the advice.  My father’s timely advice helped to change the way in which I reflected on my personal experiences which is something that I have done a lot while in China.  Combined with the lessons that I learned from Emma and her colleagues I soon became reticent in my desire to change.  As I have become distinctly focused on making my career meaningful for myself I discovered how important my link to humanity really was.

In my search for personal meaning and my true vocational calling I discovered that I wanted to make the world a better place by relating my lessons from my experiences abroad.  That visionary question came up in manifold ways in H.G. Wells’, “The World Set Free”.  This fictional accounting of a world which works together through creative vision inspired me as a person.  Being able to write about my experiences in China is one way in which I feel great happiness.  I also look forward to being able to eventually return to America in search of further education.  I feel a great connection in trying to continue learning, experiencing, and living abroad still.  That is why at this point I am considering joining Cory the following year in South Korea.  Teaching in South Korea would give me another unique perspective which would greatly enhance my ability to understand the world in which we live in.  The more that I understand the world today the stronger my connections I can make will be. 

Last quick note.  I am currently reading Victor Hugo’s, “Les Miserable’s”, and Mark Twain’s, “Roughing It”.  Both works are exceptionally vivid in their elements and represent two vastly different experiences.  I truly find the work of Victor Hugo as inspiring as well as being a masterpiece of literature.  Seeing the world through the eyes of someone who has witnessed the tumults of the past signifies a world in which one is not able to reach in this life time physically.  Mentally seeing all of the parallels within the human conditions then and now produces a relief in my mind that humanity is quite similar across time and space.  That does not mean that it has to always be this way though… 

I am less than seven days away from seeing my parents and very excited for our reunion!  Best to all friends and family back home!

Erik